The Dance of Motherhood and Sacred Business
Behind the scenes in my business, launching a paid subscription offering and an invitation to share your magic in community news...
Hello… I am Lauren, a Mother of two daughters, a Coach, Soulful Business Mentor, Writer, Creator, Sacred Space Holder and multi dimensional human being. I support those forever changed by Matrescence and the journey of Motherhood. Please do subscribe to join the journey…
The two most transformative journeys in my life have been birthing myself as a Mother AND the undulating experience of birthing, and sustaining, a business that is lead by Heart and Soul.
Both are my Heart Work. Both are deeply rooted in creativity. Both feed me in different ways.
Instead of them being separate from each other, the two now co-exist. Instead of conflicting… they actually support each other.
I recorded a podcast last year about the gifts that Motherhood have given me in my business which you can listen to below if you feel called.
What is Sacred Business to me?
While I know the word ‘Sacred’ has become a bit of a marketing buzz phrase in recent years - it truly does sum up the way I feel about my Business. To me ‘she’ is a living, breathing being that I am devoted to serving - even when sometimes she calls me towards some daunting places.
She is hard to label, she is seasonal and cyclical, she doesn’t fit into a 60 second elevator pitch (even though I tried for years at various networking events).
She has lead me on some merry adventures, and she has taught me some hard lessons. She doesn’t make ‘sense’ to those who follow a more steady linear path - and it has taken the best part of 20 years to accept that.
The beauty of her wildness is that when I became a Mother she moulded to meet the needs of my family.
And, not only did she bend and flex to fit in around Mothering - but she actually GREW and EXPANDED. Something I wasn’t lead to believe would be possible.
Now… don’t get me wrong… there have been some deeply challenging phases of the journey, and I am very open to sharing them - but this has mostly been when I have fallen into the pattern of trying to go against her magnetism, following the ‘shoulds’ or being guided by fear, instead of trusting her gravitational pull.
Dancing with Motherhood AND Sacred Business
We often talk about the ‘the juggle’ - by which I mean trying to hold everything together at once… but juggle feels very un-grounded, unstable… as though something might drop at any moment. When I think of myself ‘juggling’ I feel overwhelmed and on the edge.
The language we use in our inner narrative matters, and so I started to consider this move between Mothering and my Business as more of a ‘dance’ … feet on the ground, moving this way and that way, side stepping, moving back, gliding at times, jumping at others… and it felt a lot more embodied, a lot more beautiful, a lot more freeing and empowering.
I get to choose the steps of this dance.
I want to say here - that if there is one thing I have learned about Motherhood and Business - it is that there is absolutely NO ONE WAY that it works for all. We all have different values, priorities, experiences, situations… and it is always important to make sure you are not comparing your version of the ‘dance’ to someone else’s.
The ‘dance’ that works for me…
I learned very quickly after having my first daughter - that one of the ways to ensure I felt topped up and fulfilled was to spend time inside my business and create. Whether that was creating for others in an aligned way, holding space for clients in their own transformations, or creating for myself.
It meant that I have made the decision to prioritise having paid childcare from early on in my little ones’ lives. With both girls I have been back to some semblance of client work from around 4 months postpartum… and in all honesty - my own creative work hasn’t really paused for more than a few weeks before and after birth. I also want to acknowledge that having this paid childcare is a privilege.
I have dabbled with doing a ‘day in the life of’ before but there is just so little consistency in this season of my heart work that I thought instead I would give you an overview of my typical weekly rhythm (in term time, when everyone is healthy and well!!!). My husband works in London and is out of the house from 6am until just before 6pm so the weekday parenting is predominantly in my hands.
Our weekly rhythm
On Mondays I have both girls all day. It is essentially an extension of our weekend and I love to make these super slow and with very little planned in. I might get to dip into an email here or there but generally this is definitely a NON work day! We tend to go for a walk, make and eat food together, potter around the house or maybe go for a playdate. My Mother in law will often pop round for a few hours in the afternoon to play with my eldest which means I can be with the baby, or get dinner ready if she is happy playing.
On a Tuesday my eldest is at preschool from 9am - 4.30pm. The baby is with our amazing Mother’s Help (who also happens to be like the older sister I never had) so I can focus on my work as fully as possible. Tuesdays are my longest work day so I tend to try and schedule calls and sessions with people on this day, and write my Wednesday Substack post. I love the fact that while I get focused time with my creativity, I can also pop down for cuddles with the baby whenever I want!
Wednesdays is a day with just me and the baby while my eldest is in preschool from 8.30am - 3pm. If she naps and I manage to keep her asleep when stationary in the buggy (we haven’t managed cot naps yet) then I will try and do some bits on my laptop, but it is never a given so I try and have zero expectations!
Thursday is another day with our Mother’s Help and the eldest is at preschool from 8.30am - 3pm. This is another day I will schedule calls and work with clients predominantly - which can be anything from designing brand visuals, building their website or holding zoom coaching, consultancy or human design sessions.
On a Friday my eldest has just started doing an extra morning at preschool, which is 8.45-11.45am… this leaves me and the baby just about enough space to have a little play and a nap (her not me… because, well… buggy naps!!!) before I collect her. Friday afternoons we tend to keep nice and open because everyone is a bit tired and emotional as we head towards the end of the week!!!
I will often work a Saturday because I feel that I can totally hand over responsibility to my husband while I dive into my creative projects - this tends to be more for my ‘stuff’, and I also like to get some admin done to help me feel prepared for the week ahead. This can be anything from emails, catching up with Substack connection, writing, prepping human design readings… whatever threads needing weaving together to help me feel organised and able to settle into the rest of the weekend knowing I can be present without the pull of work.
Sundays are a non negotiable family day. I am fiercely protective of this day and it would take an awful lot for me to do anything that didn’t involve all of us!
This is all a moving spiral… it is currently where we are at but as different Mothering seasons come and go - there is always an element of flux.
What about you? What does your weekly rhythm look like right now? What Mother/Business season are you in?
How I want to bring MORE of this to The Mother Well…
This ‘dance’ is something that crops up for me time and time again in my Mothering, so it feels totally natural to bring a little more of that conversation to this space.
One of my values in business is transparency, and so from now on I will be adding a little bit of the business behind the scenes into my posts here. My hope is that this will take away a little of the ‘smoke and mirrors’ that there often seems to be around sharing the backend of our working life and how we manage it alongside Mothering.
So, what is really going on beneath the surface right now…
A few weeks ago my eldest had a sickness bug - if you happened to watch my live Instagram chat with Jessie Harrold then you will have seen that towards the end a little person joined me and announced that she had just been sick on the sofa! If this doesn’t represent the dance of Motherhood/Business I don’t know what does! This did mean that I had to ask my husband to work from home so that we could tag team calls and our work between eachother.
Last week was supposed to be a catch up week… BUT then if you read this post you will know that I had a migraine which slowed me down and forced me to re-evaluate.
So far this week we have got to Tuesday (at the time of writing this) and our Mother’s Help is unwell so I am currently writing this from the floor of the living room surrounded by toys and a baby who is using me as a climbing frame.
Luckily - the nature of the clients I work with means that these little obstacles are met with love and compassion, and of course this is why I have my own Business - so that it can be truly Mother-centred.
In the studio
In the studio over the next few weeks I am working on the beautiful new Visual Identity for a wonderful ‘womb-centred’ brand - I have been deep in her Brand Questionnaire, making Soul Boards and finalising her colour palette, and this week will be beginning on her logo and symbol. I get so excited at this part of the process because there are so many directions we could go, I get to play with fonts (which I adore) and see what wants to come through.
Full disclosure… my design client work is a lot slower than it used to be - partly because there isn’t a huge influx of new business at the moment - but also I think this is to match up with the fact that my capacity to hold many projects at a time is limited and I am so enjoying going slowly with them now.
Things not going to ‘plan’…
Last week I was due to run my Autumn Business Ceremony - a planning workshop for those who want to devote time to their business ideas. I have run this numerous times in the past and the uptake has always been really great. But this time the numbers were not quite as I expected so I took that as a little sign from the universe and allowed myself a Manifesting Generator pivot (more on Human Design and business/mothering coming soon I promise). I have learned to listen and ‘respond’ to what the Universe is bringing me, so after communicating with the guests that had booked, and offering a solution that DID excite me, I decided to cancel it.
I think it is really important to talk about the times when things don’t go to ‘plan’ as we often only hear about them when they do! In my experience they are usually more of a re-route rather than a total dead end - and believe me - I have had plenty of these in my twenty years of running my own business!
Projects being birthed…
Fueled by my health I have been making decisions as to where I will be focusing my time and energy this coming season… I decided to let go of the current planned format for one of my shorter upcoming offerings in favour of one that will suit my time and energy. I have also been bedding in the ideas I have for my Autumn/Winter mastermind (which is called Beyond: The MotherMind) and that is feeling utterly delicious. You can see the brief outline, and join the waitlist, here if you feel curious.
…AND this one feels really exciting… and also a little nerve-wracking…
I have made the decision to create a paid offering here on Substack…
Having been here for 6 months now I feel very well rooted in this space and it feels way more than just an experiment - which is what it originally set out as.
It feels like home.
I see myself pouring a lot of creativity here - and I adore it. I feel excited and expansive and so connected to myself and this community - and I simply want to be able to offer more.
However, I know myself well enough by now (it only took me 40 years!) to realise that in order to create my most magical and aligned heart work - there needs to be an element of spaciousness around when and how it is birthed. So while I promise to shower anyone who chooses to support my work through a paid subscription with goodness - I am not placing myself on a super strict rigid structure because I know that it stifles me.
This is what I KNOW you will receive if you choose to upgrade to paid…
My Seasonal Business Ceremonies - a pause in time to reflect on the season past and plant seeds for the season ahead in your heart work. These will be held four times a year, live on Zoom, but with recordings sent if you can’t make it live.
A monthly Mother’s Replenish practice - this will vary from month to month as to whether it is a pre-recorded offering or a live online session (again with recordings sent after). Think Yoga Nidra, Restorative Yoga, Cacao Ceremonies and whatever else the community craves. (plus occasional guests coming in with deliciousness like Sound Healing)
Surprise Bonus Content shared as I feel called around Sacred Business and Mothering. This will be anything from written pieces to audios, guest interviews, live workshops, spontaneous online circles, journal prompts and more. And yes… there will be plenty of Human Design chat too for those who are curious!
If you enjoy my work, and want to dive deeper together, I would be so honoured to receive your paid support…
An Invitation to community shares…
I want to bring in something new to my weekly newsletters, and that is a Community shares section. This is about showcasing the wonderful Mothers here who are putting offerings out to the community - paid or free. It could be a workshop, a guide, mentoring sessions, a retreat… absolutely anything that you want to share with the world. If you have something coming up then please email me lauren@laurenbarber.co
And finally… tell me about your heart work…
I would LOVE for the comments of this post to be a little introduction thread to you and your heart work, please do share all the juiciness about Business if you have one, along with what season of Motherhood you are in, and if you don’t currently have your own Business I hope you can soak up some of the magic and richness from other Mother creators out there.
I would love to hear from you if any of this sparks something, and if you feel called to share with other like minded Mothers I would be so grateful.
Until next time lovely ones
Love
Lauren
xxx
Go deeper together…
If you enjoy my work and wish to go deeper you can…
Oh lovely I absolutely adored getting a peak into your life and weekly routines.
I also don't like the word juggle and use dance instead haha
I'm doing business very much in union with my babies in the current season I am in. My partner works 4-5 days a week on his own business but not at home and I do mostly everything on 1-2 days a week. I have a photography business alongside my writing here on Substack and it all fulfils me very much. We homeschool and even though my eldest does do a homeschool group twice a week in the mornings, my littlest is always with me so I can strongly relate to having the laptop out in random places trying to put together a sentence that makes sense while colouring and playing fire trucks at the same time 😂
But like you say - it all complements each other.
I have definitely, despite the sleep deprivation, noticed more efficiency in my work. It also just feels so god damn fulfilling to nourish that creative side of us when we do get a chance.
Also very excited to read about some of your new offerings here. Cannot wait for more of your magic ✨ xx
“The beauty of her wildness is that when I became a Mother she moulded to meet the needs of my family.” Oof! Yes. What a gorgeously inviting post, Lauren ✨
I feel I have so much to respond to here but mostly want to say a resounding YES to dancing rather than juggling. Life feels overwhelming at times and, you’re right, the language we use can add to that overwhelm.
I think our weeks will look very similar when my maternity leave ends. That’s the kind of balance and looseness I’m aiming for. Your offerings sound brilliant too and I can’t wait to take you up on them just as soon as I return to a rhythm with life and work 💫