Are we forgetting the essential medicine of Summer rest?
Thoughts on honouring our ebbs and flows amidst the energy of Summer
Hello to anyone who is new hereā¦ I am Lauren, a Mother of two daughters, a Writer Soulful Business Mentor, Website & Branding Creator, Human Design Guide, Sacred Space Holder and multi dimensional human being. You can find out more about my work here. Please do subscribe to join the journey, and if you enjoy this, and you do have the means, I would be so grateful if you chose to support my creations for Ā£5 a monthā¦
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Hello lovely one,
How is your heart feeling at this mid point of the year?
I wasnāt āsupposedā to write to you today ā but the sacral urge was irresistible and as words formed I decided to let it flow.
This week my body pulled me to a haltā¦ as someone who walks with anxiety a lot of the time, I have learned that she gets louder when I am not tending to myself fully.
A migraine a few weeks ago signaled to me depletion. Health anxiety has been dominating my thoughts more than it has in a while. A low level of āworryā that makes me feel like at any point I could ātip over the edgeā. Overwhelm bubbling in my mind that brings all of my thoughts to the surface when I crawl into bed and try and capture a few hours of sleep before my youngestās first wake of the night.
Oh sleepā¦
I truly thought that by almost 18 months sleep would have improved. And it hasā¦ to the extent that it is not hourly wake ups and constant night feedsā¦ but it is far from restful. The accumulated months of not getting proper rest have left me unable to drop into what feels like a restorative sleep with vivid dreams haunting the hours when I do have my eyes closed and constant āto doā lists swimming around my mind when I am awake.
If I get REALLY truthful with myself I have been āwingingā it a little recently. Not tending to myself as I know I should. NOT taking as many walks on my own. NOT laying on my mat as much as I need to in this season of wild Mothering. NOT taking as much nourishment into my body as I know I need.
I have NOT been fully taking my own medicineā¦
The micro moments have been there, they are what I survive on, but they arenāt enough to really re-nourish me right now.
Nobody speaks too much about Motherhood at this stage. The early postpartum daysā¦ yes. The pregnancy daysā¦ yes. But 18 months in ā the years before a school routine gives you some sort of structure and spaciousness, and when you are āsupposedā to have found your rhythmsā this phase not so much. The invisibility of the intensity of this phase continues to surprise meā¦ even though I have been here once before.
Anywayā¦ I digress.
As I finally listened to the shouts of my bodyās need to slow the āfā down I lay down on my yoga mat.
My body melting with relief that I had finally listened to its callings and given it the pause it neededā¦
Bones becoming heavier.
Flesh being taken by gravity towards the earth
The ground reaching up to hold my body.
Limbs like lead weightsā¦ like earthā¦ breath growing slower and slowerā¦ my nervous system responding swiftly thanks to the many hours of āpracticeā I have stored within. Thank you past versions of myself.
An invitation arises in my guided Yoga Nidra practice, asking me to anchor to my Sankalpa ā a present tense statement to support my needs and desires in this moment.
I AM RESTORED.
These were the words that bubbled up.
I AM RESTORED.
I AM RESTORED.
I AM RESTORED.
Silently embedded into my practice, into my receptive body. Yes. This is what I wish to feel in this season of my life. Restored. Replenished. Revived.
A deep exhale left my lips and I drifted through a beautiful guided practice.
On the other side, as the practice came to an end and as I began to emerge into the physical plain once more, thoughts drifted in and it is these contemplations I wish to bring to this space today.
Here in the Northern Hemisphere we are in the āexpansiveā season of Summer. The Bloom. The energetic HIGH. The full expression. And yetā¦ so many of the people I speak to at the moment are BONE DEEP TIRED.
Exhausted. Depleted. Empty.
Why? I have to ask myself why?
In conversation with the wonderful
over some voice notes we shared similar feelings and contemplations as to this call to rest. To pause. It seems this word ārestā is very much on our hearts right now.Is it the season of Motherhood we are in? Is it the state of the world collectively? Is it the fact that we are ā in part ā remembering our cyclical wisdom and saying āfā you to toxic productivity and aligning ourselves with our internal ryhythms, but still very much in that learning phase?
When I think of rest, I think of winter. Of underground efforts.
And I have to sayā¦ I am very āgoodā at wintering now ā apart from the cold weather and grey skies, I actually really thrive in the winter months. I feel like I am āallowedā to be more internal, to not make plans. I have unlearned the habits of linear living (to a point) and learned how to embrace the inward energy of the darker months. It suits the depth that my soul needs.
However, I also love the long nights of summer, the warmth, the sunshine ā my body is craving heat right now ā BUT I also find that I canāt quite manage my energy in this time. I get swept up by invitations and external pulls, and then frazzle myself. Will I ever learn?
For some reason it feels harder to slow and rest in this brighter and lighter season. I find it more challenging to get to my mat and lie down - a part of me thinking that I āshouldā be doing something way more YANG.
The wisdom of my body guides me. When I tune into my inner cycles - moving from my bleed (inner winter) to ovulation (inner spring/summer) is by far the hardest transition for me. I enjoy the depth and richness of autumn and winter, my body ā since Motherhood ā seems to struggle the most with my inner spring and summer phases. I get more discomfort physically, and feel way more unstable emotionally.
What I am leaning towards now is that actually, perhaps it is actually MORE important to rest in the summer months than the winter, to counteract the outward energy?
When I tune into this season of creativity, I feel a lot less called to bring newness into the world and again ā in discussion with
ā we talked about how really this IS the time to sit back and enjoy the fruits of our labour from the work we have done over winter. We set the foundations, we planted the seeds, we have nurtured themā¦ now they bloom and we get to enjoy the outward expression. Exceptā¦ in our modern culture we are constantly pushed to do more. Have more. Achieve more.When we look at nature it is in a state of pause at the peak in many ways. Yes of course there is still growth ā but the real work has taken place in the darker months. We are at the crescendo of the expansion over this next month or so, and if we donāt take a moment to sit back and look at the beauty of full flower, to integrate all that we have doneā¦ we are missing the magic.
Right now what I really want to do is just lay out in the sunshine, let my body be revitalised by the rays of the sun and the warmth of the earth. I wish to walk around gardens and soak in the beauty of natureās efforts. I desire to taste the sweetness of sun baked strawberries picked from the plant. I want to sit by the sea and watch waves lap in and out. I donāt actually want to be ādoingā, I want to just BE in the magic and beauty of this expansive season.
So I come back to this questionā¦ is it actually MORE important to pause, to rest, to slow down in this summer season? Andā¦ if we donāt ā if we push for MORE ā will we actually be missing out on the time we can soak in the nourishment to store up for the darker months ahead? And in doing so will this just perpetuate a cycle of continuing depletion?
I write this not as a āsolutionā giver but more of a conversation starter? A series of questions and contemplations? I am curious to know how others find this season? How do you manage your energy in the Summer months? Am I the only one that this realisation is suddenly dawning for? Please do share your comments and thoughts below.
If you need to sink into rest below you can access The Held Heart Yoga Nidra which is currently out in the world from behind the paywall. It is 25 minutes of restoration for you and I would be honoured if you choose to receive it.
Until next timeā¦
With so much love and gentleness,
Lauren
xxx
An invitation for you to pause, integrate and receiveā¦
Join
and I for our first online Holding Stories gathering this Saturday at 11am BST. This is a chance for you to soak in the magic of the solstice AND the full moon in Capricorn, as we lean into the medicine of the rose and her sweet whisperings to us. Click the button below to get all the information and book your space.In conversation with
I had the absolute honour and privelege of talking to Claire for her Sparkle on Substack podcast. We go deep into creativity and space holding and the journey I have taken here on Substack. I am so grateful to her for inviting me to share my story. You can listen to it below.
Go deeper togetherā¦
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So much of this resonates, especially that part about the early motherhood years past postpartum but before preschool.
For me, the abundance of summer feels overwhelming. Rest comes differently in those small, present moments, afternoons at the pool, beach vacations, and walks, scooter rides with my kids after dinner and generally enjoying the warmth and sun. But itās also more important than ever that I hold boundaries so as not to get burnt out and overheated. Boundaries become my rest practice.
In my cycle, summer is similarly very overwhelming for me emotionally. I have to be very careful that all my energy doesnāt burn everything down. Being present with all my internal seasons has helped me so much in choosing practices intentionally and extending grace and compassion toward myself.
Oooo yes feeling this. Especially what you say about this chapter of mothering, when they are not babies anymore but it is still so hard and you feel like you should have it sorted but of course its not and there is a death/rebirth of self again and again. Feel as though I am digging very deep right now...! And yes to summer rest, I read some words in Katherine May's solstice post about this moment as traditionally being the pause between the growth season before the harvest takes place. I feel as though that is probably deeply ingrained, as well as of course the rhythm of a break from study and the summer holidays in our bones. It all feels as though it overlaps. Sending love to you and can't wait for our solstice stillness medicine gathering tomorrow xx