What would you write if it was 'just' for the beauty?

When writing and sharing doesn't feel 'useful' and yet still holds so much purpose…

Hello lovely one

How is your heart today? How are you tending to yourself this week?

I am feeling the ache of past seasons lost and new seasons coming. My nervous system needs a lot of nature and walking and movement right now to assimilate and process the months that have gone by, and to ready me for the darkness that looms.

I look forward to the darker months, they feel rich with creativity and depth, but also, the transition into them is always a wobbly one for me. So I am leaning on mini rituals and micro moments of ceremony in my day to ground and settle my delicate system.

Moon rise over the lake on an evening walk to ground me.

What if doing it just for ‘the beauty’ was enough?

This was the sentence that landed within me this morning. The desire to write and share was there, but the form and clarity just… wasn’t…

All the time I have a desire to write and connect through the power of words, then I will always open a page with utmost curiosity, because the very action of doing that usually awakens something within me.

When I write it feels like I open up a channel and connection to something vaster than me, I think that it is why I simply cannot live without it.

Once you have tasted that conversation with the divine, it is like a drug that you can’t give up. It nourishes me.

But, instead of writing a neat and tidy ‘formulated’ piece, what if it is OK and ENOUGH to purely share words and sentences that feel alive within me, without a carefully constructed structure?

Pathways and portals through different dimensions on my buggy walk today.

If I take away the need to write something ‘useful’ and simply focused on something that felt beautiful to express… what would I write then?

I would write about my toddler drawing on the table this morning with pen that doesn’t come off, and all the many micro moments of chaos that greet me everyday.

I would write to soothe my very tender heart and body at this transitional time as I feel the autumnal shift as a type of grief and excitement all mixed together.

I would write about the excitement — and nervousness — of traveling to London again this weekend for another weekend of training with Pause Place.

I would write about the fact that, for various reasons, my husband has worked from home a little more this week and it felt so unbelievably soothing to have another adult here. It also felt like a tease of what ‘could be’ if our working lives looked different and I won’t pretend I don’t long for that.

I would write about the delicious ache that runs through my body today from my strength training session yesterday and about how I have felt something stir inside of me since picking up weights again four weeks ago. Something I haven’t felt since before I was pregnant with my first daughter over five years ago.

I would write about the intensity that I have felt in my body through the triggers that my 5 year old is sparking within me as she lands in this new phase of her life, and also about the heart melting moments of deep connection that I have had with her too. The paradox… always.

I would write about the dreams and visions I have for the studio space I have spent the last decade wishing for as I look at the holes in my garden and bare concrete platform that awaits the wooden structure that will be here in a matter of weeks.

I would write about the way vibrant gold leaves twirled and danced from branch to floor, spreading like confetti, on the path ahead of me while I walked my youngest in the buggy for her nap today.

I would write about everything, and nothing, and all the in between moments that truly represent my humanness.

Is that what the world needs more of perhaps?

Real life, real time, raw beauty in the act of just simply living. Not polished, not perfect. Just real.

Moments of connection with my eldest over cards, cacao and notebooks

I notice an inner story running, that I should only write here when I have something clear and ‘useful’ to share.

But what if I wrote purely for the alchemy that occurs when I invite the words to pour out?

What if it was enough to simply place words in a rhythm that feels true to me, that feel nourishing to let flow from my fingertips? What if that was enough?

What if it wasn’t about creating gripping titles and headings that ‘capture’? What if it wasn’t about resources and tips?

What if I write purely for the beautiful process of writing? Purely… because…

What could I create? What could you create?

My writing come to me in various forms. Sometimes poetic. Sometimes as short sentences. Sometimes a simple word and sometimes I feel like I could write a book in one sitting.

Sometimes they appear to mean nothing, but of course they also mean everything.

Words are my prayers. Words are my poetry. Words are my medicine and a balm to the sores that come from living with my heart open.

They don’t always have a purpose. They don’t always have a linear meaning. But they have a transmission that I trust implicitly. They will greet and meet those that need to receive them and they will simply swim past those that don’t.

Late afternoon autumn light shining on items that soothe my soul.

So, in the spirit of sharing words that simply feel beautiful to me, I leave you with this poem that I wrote when I sat in circle for my last Pause Place training a few weeks ago…

The tongue of my heart

speaks a language of love

but love isn’t linear

it dances through my throat

and feels tender to share

a spiral that rises

expands and contracts

choking me and freeing me

in one mouthful.

So dearest one, let’s do it for the beauty. Let’s do it for the heART. Let’s do it for the magic.

Are you with me?

Until next time.

Sent with so much love

Lauren

xxx

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Hello to anyone who is new here… I am Lauren. A Mother of two daughters, Writer, Women’s Circle Facilitator, Sacred Business Mentor & Guide, Soul Branding & Website Creator and multi-dimensional human being. I walk with, and hold space for, others who are treading the tender path of their heart and soul work. You can find out more about this space and what to expect here. Please do subscribe to join the journey, and if you enjoy this, and you do have the means, I would be so grateful if you chose to support my creations for £5 a month…

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